I decided to change the song. After SO long someone has to take action! So i will be the ONE. (laugh).
I am sure all of you are familiar with this song.
Things have been happening in these past week. I am still wondering how is Baolin's father's condition and how we can action on it. But i guess baolin mention before if anything happen she just want to be alone with her family. I and the whole of FTM wish them well.
So fast my brother's wedding is next Saturday. My brother is preparing while I am waiting for instructions if he needs help. If not, then i will just dress pretty and act pretty lor. Become a vase. hehehe.. Just hope my makeup will not crake. Just for info my mum will not be attending his wedding. She is very upset over it but then now she has a tube in her and she cannot sit for even 10 mins for us to bring my mum to the church. So she has to give it a miss.
At 10.50 pm having monday blues. hehehe..
Lets move on from this topic .. i should stick to the topic of The One.
Since it is the week before the wedding for my brother lets go into this topic of the one. I always read Xin blog and she is worried about being alone for the rest of her life. This weekend, i met up with a old classmate and she was feeling low that everyone round her seems attached and married but her. I bet everyone feel that certain amount of pressure of not getting attached and not finding that ONE! Well ... even though i am attached and soon going to be married. I was there and done that. Dunno how to convince you that i understand totally what you all feel.
I use to think that i was not good enuff. I will live a lonely person. And i was just a pure moody person. A person in depression... comfortable with this despression. Afterall i am not pretty... i am big size (fat lar.. ) and i am not a very competent person, rough, have sweaty palms (who wants to hold me), tomboi, and all the guys treat me like their buddies. Have to note .. i was from a all ger's school and i have few guy friends. Plus, i was not that likeable. I keep comparing with the many pretty people out there.. everyone else is better than me. And I have admit to you that i have compared marcus with the many guys outside...there is always some quality or something better in someone else. No one is perfect.
The morale of the story is that dun fear that you will live lonely. Just worry you might not be able to live life to the fullest. I feel in the world there is many things in life which one can do and enjoy. god has all plan for us. Dun compare with people with what you have with them. Sometimes what we envy is actually their suffering. (ponder on that) What we see may not be what the real story really is.
If you believe in God. Believe that everything happens for a reason. Maybe the person you meet today may not be the one you think is better then the last one. Or how come you didnt end up with the person. Maybe the decision of you two together is not fated and the best outcome is get to come.
Believe that all of your are worth it. Coz in my eyes... you have so beautiful qualities. Dun let anyone say other wise. coz if they do .. I WILL BE THE ONE TO DIG THEIR EYES OUT.
Hushie's sentence " Dun look with your eyes, listen to the heart where your eyes cannot see"
Signing off. Till the next time i change a song.
With love,
Cindy.